Hella Good Omelette

I am the biggest egg snob you have ever met. To be honest, I don't actually like eggs. Growing up, my dad would get me to eat eggs by topping them with so many things, the actual egg underneath was but a distant memory.

Even then, it had to be the right topping. Heaven help the man if he served me GREEN PEPPERS. Ugh.

Anyway, this hasn't changed. But I don't have my daddy to top my eggs for me anymore (*sadface*) so the result is very creative egg recipes. When visiting my sister last year to help her through chemo - she's in full remission now, hooray! - this came in handy, since chemo messes up your taste buds and it was hard for her to eat.

Today's omelette doesn't have nearly as noble an origin, however. Basically I had woken up with my heart set on huevos rancheros (Rancher Eggs, kind of like nachos but with scrambled eggs) but discovered I was out of salsa. After I'd finished HULK SMASH-ing the kitchen, I made this omelette as  a consolation prize, pulled out all the stops because I was hungry and mad, and made something GOOOOOD.

I'm almost certain there's still an omelette in there somewhere.

Ingredients PER OMELETTE: - see below for explanations of ingredient varieties and substitutions
2 eggs
1 tbsp water
Pinch salt
1/4 tsp garlic powder
1/4 tsp cumin
5 cherry tomatoes or grape tomatoes, quartered
1/4 cup cottage cheese
1 oz shredded chipotle-flavored cheddar, or to taste
1/2 avocado, diced

Preheat a small skillet over medium heat.

Combine eggs, water, salt, cumin and garlic in a bowl and gently beat with a fork. You need to make sure the cumin doesn't make a glob but instead gets beaten into the eggs, so keep beating until it is more or less mixed in.

Grease the skillet by half-unwrapping a stick of butter and rubbing it around the bottom. If the butter sizzles and begins to brown, the skillet is ready. If the butter IMMEDIATELY BURNS, it's too hot! Wash it out and start over. Temperature is important.

When the skillet is ready, pour the eggs in all at once. Watch it attentively; when the edges are opaque, gently pull them back from the pan with a spatula to let the uncooked egg flow under neath. This makes it cook faster so it doesn't burn. But always be gentle so it doesn't stick to the pan. If you moosh it around, it will stick.

After completing this step, add the tomatoes. They are more flavorful if they are warm :)

When the omelette is almost cooked, add the cottage cheese and fold it over with a large, flexible spatula. Then flip the skillet over on top of a plate so the omelette falls out on the plate. I am way too lazy to try to actually use a spatula for this flipping process, ha!

Top with shredded cheddar and avocado.

NOTES:

Eggs: For the love of God and your own conscience, spend a little extra money to buy cage free eggs. Battery cages are a blight on our species. Do not get me started, just buy the good eggs. (And if you love yourSELF, also buy antibiotic-free eggs. Chicken farms are spawning antibiotic-resistant UTIs.) The advantage of this is, most good, humane farms test for salmonella, meaning a healthy adult does not have to worry about salmonella at all and can safely eat soft-cooked or even raw eggs. ALSO, they are tastier and make firmer omelettes.

Cottage Cheese: Fiber One makes a delicious cottage cheese with a ton of fiber. Using it in this omelette will keep you full longer and help you keep a healthy weight! Woo Fiber!

Cheddar Cheese: I live in New England and buy Cabot brand cheese because my research indicates that dairy cattle raised in this area are kept in a more humane way than Midwest dairy cattle. Having said that, I now fully expect to be mailbombed by a Midwest dairy farmer... Sorry, guys! You know I love farmers :) Anyway, Chipotle cheddar is amazing, but regular cheddar is fine too.

Green Chile Chicken Enchiladas

Authentic-tasting and delicious. I don't know why I keep making enchiladas, they're about the most annoying food in the world to make. It must have something to do with how good they are. Budget at least 90 minutes to make these. They aren't challenging, just time-consuming.

Sauce:
6 anaheim chile peppers
6 tomatillos
2 yellow onions, chopped
3-5 cloves of garlic, minced
1 tsp cumin
1 tsp dried oregano
1/2 tsp ground coriander
1 cup chicken broth

Filling:
Breast meat from 1 rotisserie chicken, or 1 1/2 cups chopped cooked chicken breast
3/4 cup sour cream (low fat or fat free is fine)
4 scallions, white and firm green parts, chopped
1/4 tsp salt
2/3 cup shredded monterey jack cheese (low fat cheese works well)

Also:
About a dozen 6-inch corn tortillas
Corn oil
More cheese

Cut the anaheim chiles in half, lengthwise - WEAR GLOVES while handling the chiles! Scoop out the seeds and membranes. Place the chiles, skin-side-up, on a broiler-safe baking sheet or a sheet of tinfoil, then place under the broiler. Broil for 6 minutes or until the skins are blackened and blistered. DO NOT leave the broiler unattended. When chiles are done, remove to a heat-safe bowl and cover tightly.

While the chiles cool, prepare the tomatillos. Peel off the husks and rinse most of the stickiness off the skin underneath, then chop the fruit. Tomatillos taste like a cross between a cucumber and a pineapple... people say green tomatoes are a good substitute but I think it would be better to leave them out entirely if you can't find them.

Now prep the filling. Chop the chicken breast and combine it with the other filling ingredients in a bowl.

By now the chiles should be cool enough to handle. Put your gloves back on, if you had taken them off. Peel the skins from the chiles, saving the flesh and discarding the skins. They should come away easily; if they don't, then the chiles weren't cooked long enough. Don't worry about little bits that stick. You're going to be pureeing the sauce anyway.

Once peeled, chop the chiles and put them into a small pot with the onion and garlic and a teaspoon of corn oil. Saute over medium-high heat until the garlic is translucent or the onions are tender, whichever happens first. Then add the remaining ingredients and bring to a boil. Simmer until the ingredients are all tender, remove from heat, and puree until smooth. A regular blender, food processor, or stick blender will all work just fine.

Turn the oven to 350. Heat a small amount of corn oil in a small frying pan, such as a crepe pan or omelet pan, over medium heat. Lay a corn tortilla in the oil and cook for about 30 seconds or until thoroughly heated and steaming, but not until it dries and curls - depending on your tortilla, they may need more or less cooking time.

Lift up the tortilla and place another tortilla underneath it, adding more oil if necessary. Keep adding more tortillas to the bottom until you have 8 or 9 tortillas on the stack. Then remove from the heat.

Pour about 1/2 cup sauce into the bottom of a rectangular baking pan, about 8x12 inches in size. Spread about 1/3 cup filling down the middle of each tortilla, roll the tortilla up and lay seam-side-down in the baking pan.

When all the tortillas are in, pour the remaining sauce over them, and top with more shredded cheese. Bake for about 15 minutes or until heated and the cheeses are all melted. Serve!

Hearty Mexican Chard & Chickpea Soup

A recipe modified in enough ways that I consider it mine at this point, it's fast (15 minutes if you're good!) and easy, not to mention satisfying. A good way to get some greens and fiber, too.

Ingredients:
1 head Swiss chard, doesn't matter what kind - the stems lose their color when boiled, so if white is cheaper, then just buy white
1 small can chickpeas
1 large onion
3 cloves garlic
2 cups broth, chicken or vegetable
1 tsp cumin
1/4-1/2 tsp ground chipotle pepper, or 1-2 canned chipotle peppers, seeded and minced
1 brick pepper jack cheese (low-fat works well here)
1/2 brick regular monterey jack cheese (low-fat works well here)
(Note that the cheeses must be bricks, not shredded.)

Tear the chard leaves into bite-sized pieces and set aside. Slice the ribs like celery and set aside, separate from the leaves.

Chop the onion and the garlic and sauté in olive oil over medium heat until the garlic is translucent. Add the spices and the broth and bring to a boil.

Once boiling, add the chard ribs and boil for 4 minutes. Then add the leaves and boil for another 2 or 3 minutes, or until all the vegetables are tender.

Remove from heat and add the chickpeas I do it this way so that the chickpeas cool the soup slightly, so it's ready to eat without needing an ice cube to cool it. If you don't intend to serve it immediately, or if you enjoy burning your tongue on your soup (weirdo) then add the chickpeas along with the leaves and boil an extra minute to warm them.

Cut the cheese into cubes about half an inch wide. Put 1/4 of the cheese cubes in the bottoms of 4 soup bowls and ladle the soup on top.

Frankly, you had me at "cheese cubes."

A note on chipotle peppers: Chipotle has recently come into vogue. Even McDonald's has chipotle-flavored stuff now. The chipotle pepper is a smoked red jalapeno. If you are familiar with jalapenos, then you can safely use them equivalently in terms of heat.

Until recently, I could only find these peppers in cans of adobo sauce, which was annoying because I never used the whole can before it went bad, and also I had to wear gloves to handle them or inevitably the pepper's heat would find its way into some tiny cut I didn't know I had and I'd be running around the kitchen yelling about how I should have worn gloves. Now, though, McCormick's Spices sells ground dried chipotle peppers and suddenly chipotle is SUPER easy to use. (Although I personally buy mine from Penzey's, I'm sure McCormick's is fine.) Try a sprinkle atop eggs, in anything mexican or beef-based, and on top of chef's salads!

White Chili with Chicken and Roasted Chile Peppers

Inspired by this recipe for white chili from Cooking Light, here is a subtle and unorthodox white chili whose richness comes from mashed cannellini beans and roasted chile peppers.

6 Anaheim chile peppers - Anaheim chiles are like long jalapenos, being about as long as your hand and solid green. Not to be confused with Italian peppers, which are lime green, or jalapenos, which are small (thumb-sized). If you can't find them, use 5 Poblano peppers plus 1 jalapeno.
2 chicken breast halves
1 1/2 cups chopped onion, about 2 medium or 1 large
1 tbsp minced garlic, about 3 cloves
1 large can cannellini beans or 2 small cans, drained and rinsed
1/3 tsp ground coriander
2 cups chicken broth (I use water + bouillon)
2 tbsp cornmeal
Greek yogurt, plain - use sour cream if you can't find it

Preheat the broiler. Wearing gloves to protect your hands, cut the tops off the peppers, then slice them in half and scoop out the seeds. Arrange the pepper halves on a baking sheet, skin side up, and press down on them with your hand to flatten. Broil for 5 minutes, then check on them. If the skins are blistered and blackened, take them out. Otherwise, give them another 2 minutes.

Place the peppers in a heat-safe bowl and cover with saran wrap or a plate.

Meanwhile, heat a large pot over medium-high heat and sauté the chicken breasts until well golden on both sides. Depending on your stove and the size of your pot, you might have to raise the heat to high in order to get them to turn golden. (Warning: DO NOT use a non-stick pan over high heat. It may release toxic fumes, and will damage the pan.) Remove chicken to a cutting board.

Add the onions and garlic and 2 tbsp water, and sauté until the pan is deglazed (all the brown bits are scraped up and the onions look brown as a result). Then add the broth and bring to a simmer.

Chop the chicken into bite-size pieces and add them as well.

Now take out the peppers, which should be cool enough to handle by this point. Wearing gloves, peel the skins away. They should come off easily. If they don't, then the pepper was undercooked - it doesn't matter, but next time you'll know to cook them a little longer. Throw the peel away and chop the peppers. Add them to the pot.

Put 1/3 of the beans on the cutting board and smash them with the flat of your knife, or a large spoon. Then add the beans to the pot along with the coriander and stir well.

Simmer until the onions are cooked and tender, about 5 minutes. Then stir in the cornmeal, stirring until it thickens.

Serve with the yogurt on top.